For a long time I believed what many women in tech are told. If you feel behind learn more. If you feel unsure get another certification. If you feel invisible work harder and stay quieter.

So I did all of that.

I worked in complex data and healthcare technology programs where the work never really ends. I was often the only woman in technical rooms. The one translating between teams. The one calming tensions. The one making sure things did not break even when no one asked me to do it. On paper I was doing well. Inside I was constantly tired and quietly questioning myself.

When I became a mother the questions became louder. Not about my ability but about whether I still belonged in spaces that rewarded availability more than impact. At the same time I was entering new domains learning new technologies starting over again in many ways while carrying years of experience that did not always get recognized.

This episode is a reflection on that journey. The emotional labor behind big projects. The pressure to be dependable but not demanding. The vulnerability of starting again and again. And the moment I realized that the problem was not a lack of skills but the amount of invisible weight women carry in tech.

I will also share what pushed me to create FairFrame AI. Not confidence. Discomfort. A need to build something that acknowledged bias burnout and the human cost of technology.

My hope is that listeners feel seen. That they trust their lived experience. And that they leave believing that who they are and not just what they know belongs in the future of tech.

What listeners will take away

Relief in realizing they are not failing they are overburdened

Words to name emotional and invisible work

Courage to value their experience not just their output

Soundbite

Most women in tech are not behind. They are holding everything together.